The Freshman Christmas
Dec 19th, 2007 by gibsondirect
As I think back on past Christmas seasons, many Christmas seasons come to mind. But one always sticks out. It was my first Christmas after going off to college.
I grew up in a small town—a very small town. During my early school years, I walked two hundred yards to attend my elementary school. Middle school was more of a challenge—I had to catch a bus that drove us kids a whole two miles from our house. But then once in high school, I was back to walking to school each morning—three blocks to reach the doors of our high school.
The high school football stadium was one house over from ours—free football games throughout the fall! Plus, if this wasn’t heaven on earth, directly behind our house, one street over, was a large forest of virgin pine trees—perfect for many an adventure for me and my boyhood buddies. If you’re thinking Andy Taylor and Mayberry, you’re real close.
So, for me to go off to a large city and to attend a university with a population of students as large as our entire town was intimidating to say the least. Of course, I’d never admit it then, but on that first day on campus, as I drove into the dorm parking lot for the first time in late August, I wondered if I’d measure up. I wondered if I’d be like one of those poor souls that I had witnessed go off to college and then in humiliation, come dragging back home by mid-semester.
But I survived. In fact, I kind ‘a enjoyed it this new place of the mind. However, as I came home for that first Christmas of college, I realized my life had changed forever.
For one, my parents treated me different. I can’t explain how, but it was just different. It’s as if I had jumped to a new level in life. Gone were the days of the kid who could never keep his room clean, to the young man who had survived on his own. The love I felt from my parents as a young boy seemed to change to a love of pride and respect.
Other adults seemed to treat me different. I wasn’t really on their level, but I felt much closer. The conversations were more as one might talk to a friend rather than an adult talking down to a young teenager. It felt strange. I was in a new world.
Of course, as probably every freshman college student experiences, I felt a new appreciation for my family and our home. Christmas seemed more alive than ever before. The decorations, the tree, the gifts—and especially the food, all possessed a warm, comforting glow. After a semester in a noisy dorm, I embraced my home as I had never done before.
It’s funny, but I can still feel the emotions I felt during that first college Christmas. It was a great Christmas. It proved to be a measuring stick on my life. It was a time when I realized that I had moved to a whole new level.
I’m going to step into dangerous territory here, but it is more from a point of curiosity than anything else.
In short, I would be interested to hear how women would respond to this post. As I have grown and seen the women I know live out the holidays with their family of origin and their husband’s family, it seems that very rarely to women feel like grown women in their parents’ home or in their in-law’s home. Men seem to go through some right of passage (in general) that women aren’t afforded (in general).
For my part, I watched as my mother struggled with my father’s family. I have watched my wife struggle with both of our families–especially after we had children. My sister, unfortunately, has fared no better. I have seen female friends struggle too. The exceptions seem to be far fewer than the rule.
I would be curious to hear the thoughts of women on this topic.