As one of six children in an alcoholic family, I learned early to conceal my needs, and my signature work and relationship style for a long time was Not Needy, a pose that I have not yet fully abandoned despite its obvious detriments. This brought a special punch to PeaceBang’s post about her struggle to decide whether she, as a busy single minister, is capable of meeting the needs of her beagle puppy:
… I realized that my fears about caring for the dog I had adopted were actually spiritual fears that have plagued me all of my life: how much love and care are we allowed to ask for? How much nurturing can we expect from those who claim to love us? When does our need for love and care tip into the category of “too needy,” and is there any such thing?
I believe that there is not. [...] Those who don’t have great reservoirs of love to give often accuse those who desire relationship with them of being too needy. I am finally figuring this out.
And, having figured it out:
… I let instinct guide me and shut out the old, critical voices that would judge the way I was choosing to integrate this dog into my life. [...] What if I just met all his needs and made him my focus for a couple of weeks, not rejecting him in any way for being “too needy” because he obviously wants to be with me so much?
and concludes:
We are a pack. Everyone gets, and gives, all the love they need, and it is never too much.
God bless the PeacePack.
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